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It's easy to assume the worst about the man willing to pursue an affair, but what is to be said about the other willing participant?
If he also understands you as well, the satisfaction this brings will often be more fulfilling than sex.
Some people think divorce is worse than having an affair.
If you agree with that statement, then an affair could be seen as a way of saving a marriage.
The relationship has to be secret; you can't have your parents meet him, and he will be in the arms and bed of another woman. He won't be able to drop everything to come help you if you need assistance since he's trying to keep you a secret from his spouse.
You will probably always come second in his priorities - this can wreak havoc with your own self-esteem.